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Mar
18

i am running for prime minister of israel

i am going to announce my candidacy on mother’s day in Washington D.C. As Bibi Netanyahu and Goldma Meir did, I will renounce my citizenship and according to the law of return, move just outside Jerusalem. I will ride a donkey there thru the streets and talk about making peace. When I am elected in an overwhelming landslide, I will invite Hillary Clinton to my mansion there and we will undertake beating all plowshares into pruning hooks as per our mentor King David. I will make friends with all my neighbors. Those that refuse to be friendly after I have shown them nothing but kindness will be destroyed by Guillotine after a fair trial.