November 24, 2007

yesterday

was my dad's birthday. He would have been 78. My dad had a hard life, and I added to that hardship. It's so terrible to think you are doing a good thing, and its terrible to find out that you were wrong about everything, and should not have said anything, until you were more sure of what is was that you were actually saying. To blame other people for their encouragment despite my mental state at the time, is useless, and such a waste of breath and energy. It was ultimately my choice, and I did it. I chose destroying my dad/family over silence. I have since studied the silence that meditation brings. Silence before one speaks, in order to gather one's thoughts and energies is a great tool of mind.

Posted at 3:16 PM   -  Permalink