November 12, 2007

johnny had a lot of coffee this am:

A Friendly Challenge?

Do you think it's time for those who claim to possess some kind of hidden powers, priceless knowledge and earth-shaking messages to put up or shut up? Symbolism and scrolls and secret handshakes and decoder rings are all well and good, but Halloween is over and if you're going to ask us for money to help poor God spread his spooky little message around, you ought to be able to whip something out that's as catchy as the stuff that makes everybody want an iphone or SuperBowl tickets .

I wish we'd take a break from all this strenuous believing and hair-splitting and just start worshipping Common Sense. Do we really need well-meaning, world-weary mensches in dark robes to sit in caves for forty years so they can come out and tell us to beg for peace and make sure there's enough food to go around... and warn us to STOP spending so much time listening to our inner assholes as well as the ones, outside, who boss us around? May I respond briefly? ....Duh - Memo to prophets: "Don't wear yourself out on my account 'revealing' the obvious."

By the way, "prophecy?" What's up with that? How sadistic is Religion? Are we "free' moral agents" who are responsible for our actions... or has somebody laid all our tracks and written the ending in a jar in a cave in a desert, because they know MISTER God, personally, and that's how "HE" does things? Prophecy? Let me guess: "If you let a bunch of self-righteous assholes lead you to destruction...you're going to be destroyed." Wow! Why didn't WE think of that? Look, here's my response to prophecy: Don't fix the big football game and then make me bet everything I have on it. and buy a ticket and stand out in the cold and cheer and moan and drag my kids along so they might turn out to be suckers too. Please.... Here's some prophecy for you: Check this out: If we keep dumping millions of gallons of oil in the Ocean and wasting our money on wars, we're going to be in deep shit!" Hey, look at me......I'm a prophet!

Religious nuts and politicians love to blab on and on about how babies are wonderful, precious, unique beings, but what are they going to tell them when they grow up enough to look around and say, "Hey, what was the idea of signing us up to take a long walk off a short pier, Asshole?"

I'm an equal opportunity challenger : from the Pope to bin Laden to the Hillbilly Ayatollahs like Pat Robertson to the Kaballah honchos......here it is, my brothers.......Whatta ya' got? You have something powerful and meaningful and persuasive and worthy of great respect that transforms hearts and minds? Bring it! If not now....when? I can be patient, but can we at least get an appointment?

Just make it something better than: "Be kind to each other and don't poison the planet ." Even a religion-deficient, by-product of the public schools like me knows that and we've all heard it a million times. It's the real deal and all, BUT: for this plus a ton of fine print you're considered an enlightened being whom the rest of us should herald as "seers" or something? I don't know about you guys, but I don't need a middleman to "translate" my own experience along with everything else for me. Do we have to go to a special god place or talk to a special god person or read a special god book explaining special god stuff when you can see the Infinite and its good intentions... 24/7, all over the place.... in the sky or a kid dancing around for no reason or a dog wagging its tail. Sorry if that sounds corny, but it's true as a son of a bitch. What's the big secret? What are we waiting for? Let's tell these pricks who run everything to get their shit together and stop the separatist instigating and violence.

PS: Out of respect for the millions of hungry kids in the world who don't know what it's like to ever be held and comforted, would you mind, terribly, spaying and neutering yourselves and your kids? Think about it? Or at least let's stop consuming twenty times more resources than everybody else and think that that means we're "successful." Last but not least: Kudos to people who adopt and walk that talk.

Hey, for Christmas, this year - let's all get CLUES."

Thanks for your time!

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Posted at 11:40 AM   -  Permalink