I love all the new women comics

and wish them the greatest of success on their new television shows–lisa lampanelli, whitney cummings chelsea handler, tina fey, amy pohler joan rivers joy behar and all the rest of the funny women on tv.  I hope millions more funny women will follow me and them–women are the funny ones.  Men are of course funny as hell too, don’t get me wrong–as I told C. Hitchens (the tabloid writer who explained why men do not find women funny quite brilliantly)–“I’m funnier than any man alive.”  He was quite taken back when i said that to him.  He accused me of reverse racism or whatever you call that old bullshit card they always pull out and play.  Men can never laugh at themselves too much.  That is why I love to make fun of them.  They are truly idiots for the most part, like trapped rats addicted to their maze-trix.  At one end of the maze is a sleazy whore and they will do anything to get to her.  Why do men need to lie to themselves constantly in order to feel virile?  That is what I have always wondered.  I found as a child that mirroring them and their ways and behavior would behoove me.  I most like it when a completely sexist hog will accuse me of being a female chauvinist!  That is what I consider my highest art–mirroring and yet not underlining the obvious.  It’s funny to me, anyway.  I realize many do not find me funny at all, and I forgive them, as they know not what they do.  Yes, I have a bit of a Messianic Complex, but, all writers and comics do.  When you are the only living persons in a society who still have the guts to call a spade a spade, you will begin to feel that you were chosen for a mission, and that, oh well, you may as well go for it, like King David did.  You can be like King David…and aim your stone carefully, with the slingshot of your words.

  They want all women to be whores for them, as that is the only way they can feel sexy, so belittled and threatened by their mothers as they have been trained by their mothers to be, especially the Jewish ones who snip off the end of the boy’s genitals in the first week of his life!  No wonder we have spawned psychiatry, tool of the Devil.  Women hate men and that is why they continue to raise monsters.  Their contempt for their sons is appalling, really.  Their utter dependance on their daughters is what really drives me nuts, though–christ to be the oldest child in a family is to truly know slavery. 
  I understand men in a unique way–a way only a fat girl who was assless in an ass based economy can.  

.  christ this world is so over for we women.  We will all be heartless men soon, and the men will be our bitches.  the prophecy is fulfilled. I want to marry Cher’s son Chaz.