felt like i have been going mad

here, as I have tried to use my voice in defense of working class people, especially mothers my whole life.  I have paid quite a price for it I must say, but was rewarded greatly as well.  Now, it seems as if the language of the us has totally changed on me, and I am unable to use it effectively.  Since the total state of bullshit that exists now is ever expanding in its scope, I stand mute in front of it.

  I have found that there simply is no way for me to say the things I feel should be said in this country without destroying my ability to get a job anywhere in the US media.  I don’t feel like retiring, and so I won’t.  Now that Obama has fucked up the internet, I have no hope of building a network on this site, as I have wanted to do for over a decade.  In 1994, after the death of my friend frank zappa, i tried to start a network for women on cable tv.  The people I pitched that idea to began a women’s network without me, and my partner Gail Zappa, and then turned me down for every idea I pitched to them for me to be in.
  I still had hope that I could provide women’s programming to at least one cable network in america.  I have now been turned down by every one of them for every idea I have brought them.  The infuriating thing is that months later I will see my ideas executed in other of their many new shows.  
  The issue of the star spangled banner is often brought up to me, as is the issue of dressing like hitler in drag eating little palestinian people cookies.  Oh well!  C’est La Vie.  I am not ready to retire, and prefer to be hauled off and shot by a firing squad of nazi thugs (2012) than to shut up now.  So I wrote a book, Roseanarchy, dispatches from the nutfarm.
   Here I sit, armed with my rifle and my army of pigdogs and mad Hawaiians, goats sheep turkeys and cows whom I have persuaded to join my fight against repiglicans.  I notice that even though they continue to outsmart me, the pigs have ceased digging for my nuts!  Why, we (johnny gerald peter jeff and I) have wondered.  Gerald, who is Hawaiian and Phillipino says its because everything is so dry that the ground won’t yeild to piggy snouts, so they have mutated and started only to eat the nuts on the ground.  I have perfected evolution!  repigs can be our friends when their supplies are limited!